Cheez-It Love

First week back at R-side was a-okay. I'm loving all of my professors, especially Goldberry Long and Reza Aslan. I have them back to back on Tuesday and Thursday and it is absolutely phenomenal. Creative Writing with Goldberry is definitely going to be a demanding class, but I am looking forward to it 100%. They are both such brilliant speakers. Professor Aslan can lecture for an entire hour and a half, and he's just so passionate and knowledgeable about everything that he says that it never gets boring. I love both of those classes so so much.

Monday, Wednesday, and Friday are Physics and Psychology (along with Islam discussions, which I always look forward to), and they are a lot less fun than expected. Psych 1 is actually pretty boring so far. I'm in a lecture hall with about 600 other students, and so far the professor is just really good at reading her powerpoint slides. She's a neuropsychologist or something... something to do with biology and the brain. It's Psych 1, which is physical psychology, I'm pretty sure... Psych 2 deals with the emotional factors. I'm thinking about working for a psych minor along with a Creative Writing major, so Psych 1 is one of my prerequisites. I hope it gets more interesting though. So far it's just history and that's not that exciting at all. Professor Yarmoff, my Physics professor, gives fun examples in class. We're talking about waves right now, which is pretty boring, but it's important because it is what the entire class is about... light waves and sound waves (Physics of Color and Sound). The classroom is pretty cool, though. From the outside, Physics 2000 looks like this tiny square little building that may hold 50 people tops, but when you enter, the room goes down down down under ground. There's a large staircase and rows and rows of built in tables and chairs. The professor lectures from the ground floor, where he keeps all of his equipment. And, get this: the desks are on a rotating platform. When the previous professor leaves, he leaves a mess. All professor Yarmoff has to do is push a button, and the floor begins to rotate, and HIS desk comes to the front of the room; clean white boards, wave equipment, everything. Behind the wall is an office, I'm pretty sure, and some electronic equipment. It's pretty awesome to see it happen.

Besides that, I've been going to a lot of parties and barbecues and stuff this week. Tuesday, I went to a party with my hall. Wednesday, I went to a barbecue at the AEPi house with Chanel and Danny and Ben (and Kat and Hali) and just hung out outside for a bonfire and kosher hotdogs. A helicopter flew over the house for, like, ten minutes, which is suuuper duper annoying, but then it went away. The AEPi brothers all seem really nice and I'm slowly starting to meet all of them and remember their faces and names around campus. Thursday, almost my entire hall decided to go to a Lambda party, but it was so packed that, after about five minutes of being inside, Chanel and I decided to walk over to the AEPi house for their kickback. I met even more brothers, and sort of just chilled for awhile. I swear, there are, like, six guys named Josh in the frat or rushing for the frat. It's insane, but I guess they are Jewish, so it's to be expected.

Friday afternoon, Jessica and Zach came down to hang out. We went to dinner (cheap pizza by the slice down the road) and went to see Daybreakers right afterward. Daybreakers had a good concept, but the movie was not good at all. The only thing that made it good at all was Willem Dafoe. He was hilarious in the movie. MOM: I would suggest NOT seeing it in theaters, but definitely see it when it comes out on DVD. We went back to the dorms around 9:30 and played catchphrase until about 2 a.m. with my friends/hallmates. Then we all set up camp on the floor in my room and went to sleeeep. Jackie is gone for the weekend, so we had the room all to ourselves. It was pretty awesome. We got up and went to breakfast at Denny's, and then they had to take off. I've just been doing a whole lot of nothing for the past hour, but it's almost time to turn in my Creative Writing homework and maybe head over to my friend Matthew's house for some ripe oranges and Korean pears. Gotta go running tonight, and do my Islam and Physics reading.

I got Yesterday another kind of medicine. Took him to the pet store and their fish lady couldn't tell me anything. He just had some crazy swimming fit, but he still floats on his side at the top of the water. I've got to change his water again today and put a new dose of this medicine in. It's supposed to work after three doses/ three days, and today is the third dose day, so we'll see how he's doing today. It says I can go up to seven treatments, and I really hope he lives that long and gets better. He hasn't eaten in over a week. I hope this changes. I'm pretty sure he's gone blind in one eye, because one of his eyes is always milky and filmy. I thought it was part of the sick, maybe some white fungus growing over his eye, but I'm pretty sure that he is blind in that eye. Anyway, we'll see what happens.

Time to finish my homework and productivity for the rest of the day. I've been wasting too much time on facebook for the past half hour. Time to get to work.

Back to Riverside

Yes. I am back at school. What a drag. I absolutely do NOT want to be back right now. I wish had had just a little more time. I wish that school was closer to Home. I wish I didn't live 400 miles away. But I chose my school and I like my school, so I should really stop complaining. Break was great. Seeing Budda, Moma, Pancho, and the whole rest of my friends and Family is absolutely the best time I have had in my life. I miss everything so much already. I can't believe I have to go another ten weeks before I'm home again.

I did get a 3.9 GPA for my first quarter in college, though, which is pretty damn awesome, if I do say so myself. I've got more and harder classes this quarter, though, so let's see if I can pull it off again.

I'm reapplying for my Masonic scholarship in the next few days, and hopefully I'll be able to apply for a few more. I am also applying for my FAFSA this weekend (hopefully, I guess I need to talk to my Moma about this too). It really bugs me how the government makes me go off of my mom's taxes rather than off of Aaron's. I mean, legal guardianship should count, even though he's not my LEGAL parent. I mean, really. What does the government know. Screw you, government. You're screwing everything up. I mean, there have got to be plenty more kids like me who live with someone who has not LEGALLY adopted them but have been placed under a guardianship. Even if it's not legal! It's stupid. GRRRR.

Yes. First day of classes was good, although I'm super duper tired now. My first class is at 8 a.m. on Monday, so I've been up since about 7:30, and I still need to go running (it's 6:30 p.m.) now. I regret not running for my entire winter break, but there was so much to do so much to do!! I was everywhere! It's time to get back on track though. I guess these short little blurbs are going to have to do for now. I'll start posting more often again (I know a keep saying that, but I'm going to make it happen!), but I'm guessing they'll continue to be short little blurbs like these.

Oh. Yeah. Yesterday's sick. He's got ick and he's all bloated but he's also WAY too skinny. He's not eating and his fins are deteriorating. I got him some ick water treatment and it seemed to be helping because he started scratching himself all against the side of his tank and there were white flakes coming off of him. I also got him an anti-fungus water tablet, so hopefully he'll be able to rehabilitate and he won't die. I really, really hope so. If he does die, no more fish for me until he doesn't have to do all this back and forth travelling. Poor Yesterday.

I'm already looking forward to coming Home again in mid-March. WHOO! MARCH! I can't wait until March. Time to go running, I guess.

Graham Nash's Sleep Song

Sorry for the no post. I've been pretty busy, and I will continue to be busy for the next week, but it's 1:10 a.m. and I'm about to go to bed, so I just thought I would say...

I WILL BE HOME IN ONE WEEK AND ONE DAY!!! I cannot even begin to express how excited I am. The capitals just don't do it. Then, a week after that, I'll be in Tahoe with my mommy, and then a week after that, I'll be Home again, Home again. And then a week after that, I'm back at school. Bleeh.

Three weeks isn't long enough, but thank goodness I get three weeks at all. :)

I can't wait! Until then, I have three papers to write (one by Friday, one by next Wednesday, one by next Thursday), so I better get cracking. Gotta get up in seven hours, and tomorrow is along day, so I guess I'm going to try and get to sleep now.

Seriously, though. Home. Friends. Family. COWS.

Home. <3

Official Schedule : Winter Term

I am officially enrolled in all my courses for winter term and here is what they are:

Islam (and Politics?)
Physics: Color and Sound in Communication
Psychology (of the Brain)
Into to Creative Writing

17 Units in total.

I have class everyday, and on Wednesdays and Fridays, I have class four hours in a row, with ten minute breaks in between to get to my next class. But it's all cool!

Let's see how I do. :)

Friday Night's All Right for Fighting

Weekends in Riverside have been getting pretty eventful with my newfound friends. It makes life here a whole lot more exciting, but it also has its ups and downs.



First of all, I've been staying up way too late on weekdays. It's a bad habit, but it's fun. I'm going to start going to bed earlier, though, because I've been really tired throughout the day and I CAN'T fall asleep in class [anymore]. And hey! I only fall asleep in Philosophy! My other classes are MUCH too interesting to fall asleep in. But my philosophy professor-- oh boy-- he's a droner; he's interesting but his voice has that sound that just makes me want to go to sleep. Luckily, he posts all his lectures online, and his nearly his entire lecture is based around his powerpoint.



Anyway, so, about the weekend.



On Friday, after classes were over and done with, Kat and I were left, not knowing what to do. Usually, we would hang out with Anthony and James, Mariana, Jason, Ben, Sean... Cave People (this is not all of the Cave People, by the way), but on Friday night, it seemed that most people were out and about, going out with friends, or staying in to do homework. We got so bored that we googled "What to do in Riverside when you're bored." Nothing. Really? That's not entirely true; there was a list of 101 Things to Do in Riverside, but those were cultural events with set dates throughout the year, not what we were looking for. So, we started calling people up. The first person I call seems up to hanging out-- we just want to get out of the dorms, and he lives off campus. But, after a few minutes of talking, he decides against it. A quiet night at home is what he most desires.

We go to the R.A. She suggests parks, bowling, miniature golf, movies... all fun things, but we need more ideas and more people! So, I called my friend ______. I say, "______! You're fun and social! What is there to do in Riverside?" And she shouts, "Come to a frat party with me!" And I say, "Okay."

So, we, four of us in total, all get ready and drive over to the house and we all go inside, and it reminded me exactly of those movie frat parties-- people in theme costumes, slutty girls everywhere, dancing in one corner, a bar in the other corner, dark and decorated and intimidating. Firstly, it was up between me and my friend to be designated driver, so I called it, seeing as I've been talking about that being my job since before I got to college. Secondly, I took everyone's keys-- car keys and dorm keys-- cell phones and school IDs and I put them into one bag. And then it started.

It was really awkward, and more of an observation for me. It wasn't like being at an Oakdale party-- it wasn't like being at any party that I have ever been to, and I really don't think I ever want to go to a party like that again, unless someone asks me to be designated driver again. It was for the Jewish Fraternity, and everyone seemed nice enough, except for that EVERYONE who was drinking was way over their limit. After barely two hours had passed, one of my friends couldn't stand up by herself; her boyfriend, who is also one of my friends and officially a brother, kept begging her to give her cup to him, pleading with her to go lay down in the garage. The three of us had to coax her out of the house while her boyfriend forced her out of the house; I got the car and pulled it up to the driveway so she could be shoved into the backseat easily, and then we were on our way. The entire way home, she was trying to tell me which direction to drive, and she was actually right, although I was relying on the direction of another of my friends; a couple of times she said, "I'm getting out of the car now." and reached for the handle; the other girl in the backseat was like, "You can't do that," but she kept trying until I yelled, "______! DO NOT GET OUT OF THE CAR!" to which she stopped. When we got back to school, she kept trying to run off, down the stairs, declaring that she had to pee and that she had to throw up. She did neither until we got her into the dorms, which was difficult. It was hard to sneak her in, she was being so loud. At one point, she saw her friends in one room, ran in there, and fell into the refrigerator. Luckily, one of her good friends in the hallway was awake and ran in there and helped us with her, took her to the bathroom, helped her throw up, fed her, put her pyjamas on her, stayed the night with her. She's so motherly and caring. I was very impressed. Eventually, they got her to bed, and my friend and I returned to our side of the hallway to see to the other one.

During the course of the night, my friend, who I will now refer to as "Rex", recieved a text message from her friend from her hometown, about a mile up the mountain, about how this creeper was at her house-- she didn't know he was a creeper because she hadn't had the full story told to her yet, but for the past few weeks, this guy has been stalking Rex, being overly emotional with her, sending her scary love letters, writing her songs and recording them to CDs-- it's really scary. So, Creeper is at friend's house. It's almost 2:30 a.m. and we have decided that we're going to drive up to friend's house and go get that guy out of the house. But, there's two people who have been drinking, which leaves me and two other people in the car, and only two of us can drive. So I drive up, and another friend drove down. We get there around 3:30, stay for about fifteen minutes, get her to kick everyone out of the house, wait until that guy drives away, and then leave ourselves. We didn't get back until around 5, and then we all passed out.

Very eventful night. In writing, it seems like not so much, but in reality, it was intense, and all in the course of six hours.

On Saturday, I woke up around noon (yes, noon; I don't make a habit of it on weekdays, but weekends here are different), and went to brunch with Ben and Persiah. After brunch, I thought I would be able to go into my room and get some homework out of the way, thinking that my roommate would be gone, but no. I ended up just walking in, grabbing my stuff, and running to Ben's room, where Ben and Persiah were. I didn't get much work done in there, either--we played Family Feud online. Around 3 I decided I would go into my room and try to get some work done. My roommate, when I came in, decided that she was going to leave, so what do I do? I take a nap. I slept for about half an hour, for fifteen minutes, then ten, then five, and then decide it's time to wake up. It's about 4:15, so I call Depeche, as I have promised to call him this weekend; he's busy, so we agree to talk later. Kat gets back, so I go hang out in the Cave again, to wait for Anthony so that we (James, Anthony, Kat, Dylan, Becka, and I) can all go to the beach. When Anthony finally gets here, it's about six, so we all pile into Kat's five seat car (quite uncomfortably and very illegally) and Kat drives to Balboa Beach in Newport. We get a bonfire going, and we just chill, talking and laughing, roasting marshmallows, splashing around in the water. Ten is the time the beach closed, so we stayed until ten, just kicking it. I drove back to school. When we got back, we played three rounds of Bang, this pretty cool card game, and watched SNL. Around 3:30, we went to Freshh Donuts, the 24 hour donut place around the corner, and then went back to Anthony and James' room, where we were up until about five, when we sort of decided it was time for all of us to go to bed.

Woke up today around 11:45, sat around 'til 12, went to brunch with Persiah and Ben around 12:30, came back, and wrote this blog. Today is homework and phone call day, but mostly homework day, and I don't plan on coming out of my room until I get all of my homework done.

My roommate has had a guy over for the past two weekends, and the reason I've been sleeping over in James and Anthony's or Kat and Mariana's room is that I feel so awkward that I can barely walk into my room. I tried to talk to Jackie about it, and she said they would try to leave during the day, but during the day isn't when it's awkward. Last night I needed to come in around 3 to get my blankets and pillows, and I unlocked the door so I wouldn't wake them up, and when I came back, they had pushed the lock button so that it would "pop!" when I unlocked it. The same thing had happened earlier that evening, around midnight, and it's getting even more awkward and annoying. I don't want to be feel like I'm being ostracized from the room every weekend, but thankfully, I have friends who don't mind sleepovers. :) Sleepovers are fun anyway!

Registering for classes tomorrow. I'll let you know how it goes.

SO! That's a synopsis of the PAST TWO DAYS! All of this in just two days! CUHRAZY!!

Everybody's Looking for a Hero

I've been pretty stressed out as of late. Not so much with schoolwork as with other things, like how to get home for Winter holiday and how to get back to school. I feel like I'm not going to have enough time to see everyone that I want to see and do everything I want to do for an adequate amount of time. UCR is giving us three weeks off. There are other schools who get nearly two months off. Why couldn't they just up it a week? And why does it have to be on such awkward dates? December 12th to Janury 3rd? That doesn't even seem that long. And in reality, it's not.

Last night, I hosted a highschool student from San Jose in my room, so she could get an impression of UCR. I felt like a bad host; there's not much to do and she just seemed like she wanted to text the whole time, which isn't very fun. She and her friend weren't really into any of the activities that we were required to attend, even though Kat(herine) and I were having a good time making stress balls out of balloons and flour and playing with goo. This goo was crazy! You could, like, grap a fistful of goo in your hands and squeeze it-- you know it's solid-- but as soon as you open your fist it dissolves into water. WHOA CRAZY GOO! Anyway, we ended up playing cards and Jackie, Christy, and Christy came into the room a little later and they were pretty entertaining. She said she didn't have a bad time, that she had a good time, but I don't know. We had to get her back to the bus at 6:45 this morning; needless to say, I crashed when I got back to the room.

I joined Greenpeace yesterday! While I was walking around with Stephanie (my hostee), a guy runs up to me and asks, 'Do you love the environment? I love the environment!" Yeah, I love the environment. And then he used his amazing rhetorical skills to convince me to join Greenpeace. I have to donate $15 a month to them, which I will probably do for awhile but then put my donations on pause or cancel them, for a reason that I will get to shortly, but I don't mind donating for now, especially since it's for an incredibly important cause. Then we hugged and I was off on my merry way once more.

I went midnight hiking a few nights ago with some friends from my hallway-- we were going to hike to the "C" (a big concrete C at the top of the mountain behind our school) but we only made it about halfway up because we all had forgotten water and Jackie didn't have her inhaler. It was still an adventure, though, hiking halfway. The path is very steep, and coming back down proves fairly tricky in the dark-- the trail is all sand and rock, and it is hard not to slip and slide downward. The meteor shower was pretty cool; I saw probably ten while we were up there. This is the second meteor shower I have seen since being at UCR; there is another one on December 13th, but I will be home for that one, so hopefully it's not raining or overcast and I will be able to watch that from there.

So, I have been keeping busy, making new friends, chilling out with the friends that I have made. I am officially a member of The Cave, which is part of our hallway that is sort of out of sight because of a bend in the wall-- if you didn't go exploring and if people didn't come out from there, it would be hard to know it's there. But I spend nearly every spare moment I have in The Cave or with friends from the Cave, and I have grown very comfortable with them. We are all very different, but I guess you can say that about any group of friends. They're all really cool, and I wish there were a way to introduce them to you (Mom) and you (Anna) and you (everyone else that reads this blog). They are, in no way, a replacement of my old friends; I have realized that I don't need to replace old friends to make new friends. Of course, I always knew that, but I'm saying it out loud now. You don't need to replace old friends to make new friends. I still talk to Anna, Jessica, Jessica, Zach, Yvette, Sarah, Depeche, and Cullen quite often, and there is no way, no how that I would ever stop talking to them unless Southern California split along the fault line and capsized into the Pacific. That would be quite unfortunate.

Now, for the bad news. If the UC Regents approve, my tuition is going to be raised 32% by this coming Winter quarter, and 44% by Spring. I will be paying nearly double what I am paying now for the same exact education. And WHY will I be paying more? I'm not quite sure, but I have a feeling it's so they can "generate more money in the education system and bring back blablabla..." In other words, so we can pay them for doing their crappy jobs and exploiting students. Of all people to target-- students. I know it's not just students; it's hospitals and it's small businesses. It is the groups of people who are below the elite, who cannot afford health care or higher education. Not even higher education alone! ALL education! People are always saying, "You are the future. You're children are the future!" But if they're beating us out of schools, if they're creating situations where we are not allowed to learn, then what kind of future are we looking forward to? We are the future; we have so much potential; we can do it. But right now, the future is looking pretty bleek.

There was even a proposition by the regent out of San Diego to shut down the UC Riverside and UC Merced campuses to save money for the other UCs. Just because we haven't established our names yet. Just because our established name is "University of College Rejects". Because we're the underdogs, the lower middle and lower classes on the socioeconomic scale. Because we are not the brightest, nor the strongest.

This is all crap. Maybe we're not the best at sports and maybe our students don't come out of highschool with the highest GPAs; maybe a majority of us couldn't afford to apply to more schools; maybe we're only here because we got accepted. Well, so be it. That doesn't mean we're inadequate; dumb, low, unworthy. That doesn't mean anything. We're diverse. We're friendly. Smart. A majority of our professors actually care about our education, unlike at the CSUs, where professors use their furlough days and spend their lectures complaining about pay cuts; where students have to sue because the school is cutting upperdivision classes so students can't graduate. At least we give a damn about the well-being of the state, the nation, the world; come together and fight for what we believe in.

Okay, it's true, I've officially got UCR pride. But when facing such a high mountain-- my school might get shut down; I'm going to be paying my tuition and a half in less than six months-- it's hard not to band together and fight for myself and for every other student, staff member, and professor in this school. We're a community, and communities are supposed to back eachother up, not just sit on the sidelines and watch as a few take on the challenge. We've all got to work together for this one if we want to change what is changing. We all deserve a chance, and these fee increases are going to leave most of us high and dry. That shouldn't happen. That can't happen.

We're the future. Aren't we?

Pass the Sardines, Please

I just got back from an epic afternoon at the mall with a group of friends. We went and played this game that Kat calls Sardines, which is backwards hide and seek-- one person hides while the other players go out and look for them. Texting clues is legal, which is really cool because then everyone is like "OH THEY MUST BE HERE!" and then they aren't. I don't know. It was really cool, though. Top floor of the mall + Three hours + Eight People = Fun fun fun. It was intense.

Now, I have to study for a midterm. Philosophy midterm #2, to be precise. I got a C+ on my last one, and I'm aiming to do better. I really don't care about this class though. It's completely boring and the midterm is nothing but a spew of everything that the professor said in lecture regarding the readings. I honestly don't think I've learned anything in that class... philosophy just takes me in circles. I'm hoping I do better on this midterm though. Chances are I'll freeze up and everything I wanted to say will come out wrong. If I make it through that class with a B, though, I'm happy.

It's weird to think that. Usually, I won't settle for anything less than an A-; anything to do with grades below that bothers the hell out of me. And here I am saying that I'm happy if I get a B in that class. College isn't so much harder than highschool that I should be settling for a B. Maybe it's just because I dislike the class. In highschool math classes, I would strive for an A, but if I got a B, no big deal. Just try harder next time. And of course I want to work towards an A, but I don't really see myself getting one... the class is just so boring. It's so boring I don't even want to think about it. Complaining in type won't do anything; complaining aloud won't do anything; all I can do is buckle down and hope for the best.

My brain sort of just stopped working. I've been pretty frustrated for the past couple of days and it's all sort of building up and building up. I don't like it, but I don't know how to get it out. I want to paint, but there's no painting supplies except watercolours and my vision is a big, dark acrylic. I want to write but the words just won't come to me. I even write idea drafts but I can't feel them in my heart the way that I really want them. I don't know. I just kind of need a break.

And that's what today was, I guess. But now it's time to be serious. I've got midterms and papers coming up this weekend and I need to get to work.

After I call my mom...

Aaron was here this last weekend, recording at The Ship with Earlimart, so I went over to Eagle Rock and Silverlake and hung out with Aaron all weekend. Nearly 20 hours of drum tracks for the same three songs over and over again... but it's all good! Seeing Aaron and Aaron was great, and I can't wait until Aaron comes here for Thanksgiving. Thank you Joel and Kelly for letting us come over and feeding us. :)

Besides that, school has just been school. Trying to take care of business while keeping healthy and making friends and all that stuff. I really want to go running, but I'll just have to deal and wait until I got to ab attack tomorrow to go to the gym. I've picked out my classes for next quarter (just as long as they don't fill up before I register in two weeks...). I'll post my final schedule for sure as soon as I get it.

I guess that's just a little nonsense blurb of what's going on. My brain sort of just stopped working and I kept typing and... bleh.

Time to go do stuff.